Burglar Poops in the dishwasher! Laday sawed off her hand for insurance. No peeps this holiday year?

More pandemic news: There will be mo marshmallow peeps for Halloween or Christmas this year. Woman who sawed off her own hand found guilty of fraud. Suspect broke into home, didn’t steal anything, took a poop in the dishwasher. // Weird AF News is the only daily weird news podcast hosted by a comedian because I believe your daily dose of weird af stories deserves a comedic spin.

No marshmallow peeps for Halloween or Christmas this year.

Guys. This is sad day. Weird AF news taking a sad turn with this. I mean, how do you? How do you have Halloween or Christmas with no peeps? I can’t even get into the story. Of just heartbroken. But let me try. Okay. Holidays are going to look different this year due to the cove in nineteen pandemic. This damn. Covert Takeaway peeps. Including the holiday treats that are going to be available, and there’s going to be some limitations in that department apparently. According to a news report, we won’t be able to enjoy. Halloween peeps or Christmas peeps this year due to the impact the pandemic has had on just bornes operation just born is the company behind the delicious marshmallow peep brand. Just born marshmallow peeps halted production earlier this year due to the pandemic and this fall season will be no different. Back in late March, the marshmallow treats were still released in time for Easter. You guys remember that I’m sure you had a few. Although Easter was kind of unrecognizable this year I admit but at least the people were available, you know. The Jelly beans were available chocolate bunnies. I bit off a few years myself. This year was lovely helped by myself. I didn’t go on an Easter egg hunt this year but you know I am I don’t really do that anymore because I’m not an eight year old but. We gotTA UP UPDATE THOUGH? Just. In. Just born issued a statement. On why the seasonal peaks won’t be available this year for Halloween and Christmas? For the holidays here’s a quote from them. While peeps marshmallow candies would typically be available in fun shapes and packaging sizes for the Halloween and holiday seasons unfortunately. The season varieties will not be in stores again until twenty twenty one, as you may know, due to the President President pandemic. We temporarily suspended production of our candy brands to ensure the health and safety of our associates. In early May we resumed limited production peeps after making extensive changes in our plant that ensured the safety of our associates. This situation resulted in US having to make the difficult decision. To forego production of our seasonal peeps for Halloween and Christmas in order to focus on meeting the expected overwhelming demand for peeps next Easter season as well as our other candies. We want you to know though seasonal peeps will return to stores and twenty twenty one after Valentine’s Day. I. Don’t know if that’s enough guys. I, don’t know. I mean. It’s just sad to know that you’re not gonNA have. Pumpkin peeps. just. I really like Pumpkin peeps. Very special little smiling pumpkin faces. It’s like a little tiny. Machine Jack Lynton melts so you talk. What else will you take away from me pandemic? UNFORGIVING PANDEMIC Precious peeps. The big. If. You have any peeps in a closet somewhere. Maybe. Just, think of me maybe mail them to me. I don’t care if they’re hard as a brick. This Christmas met.

 A woman who sawed off her own hand has been found guilty of insurance fraud.

A Slovenian woman has been found guilty of deliberately sawing off her own hand as part of an insurance scam. The court in La. Nina liberalization on I. don’t even know how you say this. What’s the? What’s the capital of Slovenia can anybody tell me how to pronounce this? Public school education comes through again guys I’m recording a podcast in a closet whole life.

They found Julia Ju- Legia. AL deaths. Oh. My goodness what What do I even bother to tackle the Slovenia related story? I don’t even know why but I bet I can do an accent that’s close. Let me try. Julie’s you’re taking out five insurance policies in the year before injury. She claimed she cut off hand as she was cutting branches. She was going to gain more than one million dollars in payouts. She now faced two years in prison while her boyfriend given three year sentence. Unbelievable. Julia in a number of relatives were arrested in twenty nineteen after she arrive in hospital with hand cut above wrist. Court finds that she and boyfriend. Left several hand behind rather than bringing it with them to ensure the disability permanent. However, authorities recover in time to sew it back on. That’s pretty good I. Bet you that is a Slovenia actually spot on. So she left the hand behind and was like, let’s go to the hospital will leave the hand in the in the pile of leaves at the base of the tree. And though never be able to put it back on o of the medical, the medical, the miracle of modern medicine. We sold your hand back on lady apparently, the hand can be detached for a number of hours I’d imagine, but you can still so it back on. While doing miracles these days. This makes me very confident that I if I lose a limb I’m going to be okay in the end they can so that Shebek, on and living in a time where women are cutting off penises left and right that makes me feel good as well. That if someone happens to chop off my member I feel pretty confident that even hours of the member on the ground, the still be able to put it back on. Miracles baby miracles. The prosecutors say the woman’s boyfriend had also made Internet searches about artificial hands. Days before the injury. Oh you didn’t, you didn’t use an incognito browser sir. Did you. Did. You think you could just do a search for artificial hands right before your lady cut off her hand. Did you think you could just get away with. Opening up five insurance policies a week before you cut off your hand. Well, we did a search apparently, the boyfriend was watching youtube videos on how to how your girlfriend can get through life with only one hand. He watched a few videos called how to give a hand job with only one hand and. that was crass I admit but funny funny right. So the boyfriend does some time apparently the boyfriend’s father also given a one year suspended sentence because of his involvement it doesn’t say what he did. it sounds like the family, the inlaws a specially pressured her into doing this I gotTa tell you, I, mean. I’ve had difficulty convincing. Various girls that I dated to do. The simplest of things never have I attempted to convince them to. Cut off a limb I don’t know how you. Convince your lover to cut off a limb. Sure. There’s money involved, but like if I’m if I’m Julius show I’m like screw you you cut off your hand. You think it’s so easy. You’re you’re the man, your man you cut off your own hand you do it. I’m not cutting off my own hand. I’m beautiful I’d like to keep my limbs. The now, Julia has to do two years behind bars at least she still has her hand. She claimed she was kind of funny. She claimed I should’ve mentioned this earlier but she claimed she injured herself while sawing branches. Yeah. This is just this. This. Is just a a branch sawing injury. I don’t know how you. This is the plan. I mean goodness guys. You gotta come up with a better plan than this. What people do for love? I’m always baffled being would you guys do anything of the sort for your? Wife or husband or lover whatever which you cut off even finger Outta Outta I don’t see it happened I. don’t see it happening but call the show. Let me know six, four, six, four, five, zero, two, thousand, twelve, I wanna hear if you’re crazy.

A suspect broke into a home didn’t steal anything but pooped in the dishwasher.

Police in G- wealth I. Hope I pronounced that correctly in Canada. Police are searching for a person who entered a home in Guelleh east end improved in the dishwasher. This happened over the weekend sometime between one am eight fifteen am on Sunday. Someone entered a home. Through an unlocked back sliding glass door. The people who live in the home were asleep at the time. The suspect came in and. decided. You know what? I don’t need things. I got plenty of things. I’m not gonNA Steal Jewelry. Or even have myself a meal. Not Even GonNa look in the Fridge No. Here’s a quote from the police release. Nothing was taken however the culprit defecated on the open dishwasher door before leaving the residence. That is all. If you happen to have any information on this dishwasher. poop bandit please contact constable John Hunt at five, one, nine, eight, two, four, twelve, twelve, extension, seven, three, five, nine. Yes. Anybody Up I. Know have a lot of listeners in Canada. If you guys know any information about this dishwasher poop person please call constable John Hunt. He’s He’s on the lookout for a dishwasher poop. I mean poor John Hunt he’s like twenty five years on the force I’m looking for a guy who defecated in a dishwasher. Wow. What is my life become? A although right. Now during Covid, this is very dangerous. This is a serious serious situation because I think you can pass the covert on with your with your feces I really do so be careful that family could be in big time danger. Clearly, you’re going to have to get a new dishwasher by the way they’re not cheap. So that’s a thing. Although I mean maybe they have home owners insurance it’s going to be a strange claim. Yes, you’d like to replace the dishwasher why it broke what it doesn’t do the cleaning now actually someone broke in our house and took a shit inside and we don’t want to use it anymore the kids are afraid I tried it out. The glasses are spotless still but I mean, my wife just doesn’t trust the damn thing. But. Then again, my wife won’t even share a straw with me. That’s the kind of person she is she definitely isn’t gonNA share. Anything comes out of the DISHWASHER. After a guy took a crap in it so. Police want to remind you properly secure residence by always locking your doors and windows. That’s what the article ends with I don’t think the police could ever have anticipated that someone would break into your residence and not even steal anything just. Just take a crap inside an appliance, a home appliance And all of all the appliances to choose that’s like the worst one right? I mean. Had, they shit in the garbage disposal you’re like, okay. All right. I’ll just tie up the bag and I’ll go about my day, but it’s a dishwasher. I mean what would be worse than shitting in the dishwasher? That’s just a tough one shitting in the rice cooker maybe now because even that. What’s what’s a rice cooker forty bucks or you just throw away the pot new? Shot in the drier that’s pretty bad to shitting in the drier or the washing machine. And then it goes through those holes in their the bottom and you can’t. This is very graphic I’m just trying to. You know imagine what is worse than sitting in a dishwasher. It’s almost as though this serial dishwasher pooper like targeted like this specific goal it’s so calculated it seems to me. And because they didn’t take anything from the home. My guess is this is a vengeful poop by somebody who’s close to the family. You. Know has anybody been slighted over the holidays? Or someone you didn’t. You didn’t allow over your house. You had an argument at the barbecue I don’t know I’d imagine this is a personal thing. The fact that nothing was stolen. Maybe. Maybe this is a new challenge. I. Don’t know about the Dishwasher poop challenge maybe. So maybe they asked have you asked your kids family that had. A poop in the dishwasher ask I would start interrogating my children. Is there a new challenge a new viral challenge called Dishwasher Shit I WANNA know?